Consumers have many ways to spend their dollars. It seems the more money you have the more you can afford or the "higher quality", name brand items are within reach. If your spending dollars are less, the assumption is you will trend to be a bargain shopper, frequenting stores offering more for less and possibly purchase "inferior" products.

But the challenge I put out today is not that more money equals better product due to name or quality, or that less money equals cheap construction and poor quality. Rather, why don't we look at the integrity of the product; is it sustainable, ecological and natural? Will your purchase be of your choosing or will your wallet size determine the bracket for your spending?

If I had millions in the bank, the choices for my spending would remain consistent to my choices today. There are two changes I would make however. Organic clothing would be a priority instead of a luxury and we would finally be able to upgrade our vehicle to a Hybrid or at least something with a 40+ MPG. Beyond these changes, I wouldn't let a larger wallet fill my head with dreams of grandeur in terms of what society determines is "luxury".

This is where most of us get it wrong. It isn't about the higher priced item, it is about the form and function of the item and whether or not it adds value to life in general. I don't think a higher price tag is a blanket statement for the product's true value. Think about all the high priced cosmetics found at Nordstroms, Neiman Marcus or Bloomingdales that are loaded with chemicals and questionable "paraben". Walk into any boutique clothier and see of they are using sustainable bamboo or organic fibers. Read the labels for the name brand food items. Do you see the Organic Label on the package? Do these products add to your health or do they benefit Mother Earth? Due to their higher price tag there is a perceived notion it is better, (the goal of advertisers). For me the answer is no. I try to always choose products based on their integrity instead of their price tag.

How refreshing to see Celebrities choose green living, instead of excessive living. It is about content and integrity, not about excess and wallet size. Maybe if we started to root out the truth behind our product choices we would affect truth in advertising and pricing. The consumer could buy based on true need and not perceived status. Mother Earth would start to heal, instead of fracture and then our financial status would not mean as much as the integrity of our soul. Our nature would be more important than our financial status.

If amassing wealth is the defining quality of a person's worth... look at Bernie Madoff. Is he really a person of integrity? Is he our role model for success? Is he the person we aspire to become? Think about this as you slave away at your jobs to earn a good salary to afford the house, the cars, the take out, the high priced designer labels, the fancy $3.50 cup of coffee, the latest high tech gadget and the over the top party to outdo all parties. What does all this spending really say about you? Thoughtful, wise, creative, or ______; well you can fill in the blank.

What are you working so hard to prove? What does the big paycheck really offer you, freedom, choice, integrity? Taking the steps to living in harmony with our Creators is a tough one. There are many who are making the choice and waking up to their true purpose. They work hard to balance out financial responsibilities with gainful, rewarding employment. They take extra thought for purchases and choices with their wallet. They are thoughtful and inspiring. One such story is found here. This is human challenge for all who inhabit Mother Earth. What footprint are you leaving behind on Gaea? Does she regard you with kindness or resentment?

This post is not to say I am perfect, but that I struggle with my choices everyday and it would be refreshing to see value placed on true value and not perceived value. If the size of the wallet didn't matter, could we connect more as humans and learn about our humanity?

Inspiration

"It is our choices...that show what we
truly are, far more than our abilities"
- J. K. Rowling

This quote sums up my thoughts on most things...

Musical Musings on Michael Jackson

Music was enhanced by Michael Jackson's talent. He was able to transcend the stage and go places we never knew existed. When I turned 10, I opened one of my presents and received a tape of Thriller! It was one of my first pieces of music.

That tape played over and over and over again. It was great and the music that I liked, not my parents or aunts. I was a fan!

When Michael became Jacko, my affections started to wane. I still listened to the music, but his off stage lifestyle, antics, allegations got in the way of fully appreciating him the way I did when I was 10. It was hard to piece together the musical genius/showman to the troubled man who never seemed to grow up struggling with his identity and actions.

Today, I watch the news and think, wow, what a talent, what a shame, what a loss for the music industry. It is shocking, why? Because you just think of these icons to be larger than life and in reality they are no more above the laws of the universe than you or me.

Life is a gift we are given in this reality to explore, create, experience. We should all do what we can to enjoy the life we are given as it is our most precious gift.

May you now find the peace you so desperately longed for Michael...

Happy Father's Day!

Mystikman has a great life! He loves his work, is the daddy of 2 amazing little men and is loved by mystikmomma like crazy!

Happy Father's Day Mystikman!

Claiming Happiness

A late night phone call this past week, brought about an interesting realization. When asked how my life was going, I pondered what to say. For the most part, my life is really good, solid, happy and fulfilling. But there was something nagging at me and when I really put my mind to it, I found the nagging culprit - misunderstandings in my friendships.

Every day, mystikman and I say to one another how lucky we are. We are blessed, we are happy and our life is good. This is the message I wanted to convey on the phone call, but it was mired in these friends issues I have been having.

This afternoon, I was watching Rick Steve's Milan on PBS. We watch PBS often and anything Italian sucks me in. I was sitting and saw how happy I was inside and decided that these friend issues are not worth dampening my mood. I let these hurt feelings and confused thoughts seep into my happiness and that needs to stop.

Today I say, I am happy, lucky, blessed and love my life. I smile, am content and know "All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be
well". Jullian of Norwich

There is no need to let anything dampen my mood. Okay Jacques Pepin is on PBS... ahh the French Countryside Dining experience... Does it get any better? Gotta run!

Choosing Freedom!

Recently a friend had a life event happen. Due to this change in circumstance, a new road awaits. Now the future that seemed clearly plotted is wide open. Many would look upon this change as a difficulty, hurdle or be very depressed at the initial happening. However, if taken at face value it is only a change and due to this change, the direction of the life path can be altered more freely.

Sometimes it is hard to make changes when we are in the trenches of momentum. But when the momentum is cut short, if forces us to rethink our goals, dreams and directions.

I am amazed at how my friend has taken this change and turned it into a chance at life. The choices are now many instead of few. There are more possibilities and the freedom to choose is liberating!

As a child, I played one thing and then changed my mind to play something else. I was not locked in to one set play path. The freedom to be who and what I wanted was wonderful! I love watching this unfold for my friend. There is limitless freedom with each step!

Crossed Communications!

Friendships have been a focus for me this past month. In recent days, there have been some admittances about misunderstandings and crossed communication. As I am relieved to know there is still interest in the friendship, I am confused as to how to overcome the "miss", that exists.

I find that trying to explain your position and thought process is defensive. This of course is not the point, but who likes to be misunderstood? Also I struggle with how to share my life, without it being taken as judgmental?

How do you explain yourself so it is taken as is? Is this really my issue or the receivers? I don't know, but I try and try to be open, honest, ask for clarity when I need it, but there are these crossed wires somehow in the way.

Ever notice how some people you just get; never a strong or curt word between you? Then there are others that you struggle with, have highs and lows with? I do understand we are unique and different. I get that we come with varied instructions which lean us one way or the other. We also learn new ways based on our life experiences. I just don't think it should be this difficult between friends, that is what our family is for (HA)!

Why all the explaining, misunderstanding... this is my challenge and I am not certain where to go with it, just yet.

Swimming Summer

The Venetian Pool is where we are spending our summer. Every morning this week, the boys and I have been out the door by 7:30 and in the pool by 8:30am. Considering we are a homeschool family that wakes upon our internal alarm clocks, this is a huge feat!

The boys are doing well, each in their own class twice daily. They have a break in between classes where they hang out with other children and explore, chat, play games and all things involving childhood memory making!

I teach alongside another new trainee, which is of course unheard of, as each new trainee is to teach alongside a seasoned Water Safety Instructor, WSI. So here we are two newbies doing our best to teach 3 classes of 5-9 students, 7-13 yr olds. The basics, kicking, gliding, rhythmic breathing, floating, front crawl, etc. I have to say I am really enjoying it and love the other teacher. She is organized and focused, just like me and it is great, as if we are on the same brain wave!

The water is a cool 79 degrees, everyday filled in each morning from the Artesian Aquifer . The greatest thing for me, is that it reminds me of a lake. There are a couple of small lakes that I swam in growing up. I love swimming in a lakes because the water doesn't sting your eyes, or irritate freshly shaven legs. Maybe it is my comfort zone or what I was used to, but lakes where plentiful growing up and I do prefer them to oceans.

This pool is quite amazing. The Venetian Pool has been used in movies and used to be a hang out for movie stars back in the day.

More importantly, at the end of our morning, the boys and I are allowed a free swim before the public is allowed entrance. At this time, each of the boys demonstrate their newly acquired skills and just in a few days, they have improved greatly! I have a feeling, that L will be in my class sooner than later! How cool is that?

Following the Beat of my own Drummer!

In an email sent last week, I noticed something sort of funny in my closing remarks. The point of the email was to reiterate to an old friend, that I have always been my own woman and followed the beat of my own drummer. Then I had a laugh at what I just typed as mystikman is a drummer! How hilarious I thought. I went out and not only used the colloquial phrase, but I did it, I found my own drummer!

It seems we may have very well made another drummer in the process! V is an avid drummer, beating on all things solid making noise. He has been infatuated with drum sticks and right this moment, I caught a glimpse of him drumming on the chair.

Earth Mother Goddess Day!

Today is Earth Mother Goddess Day! Let's celebrate Mother Earth and all she provides, day and night. She is the Cosmic Mother that nurtures us.

South Florida Fishing Fun

This is my fisherman! Never in a million years would I peg my first born to be a lover of this activity. L, is full of action, has a hard time focusing as he is so interested in his surroundings. Never sits still kind of guy...

But give him a fishing pole, some bait and plunk him alongside a water hole and he is content! I mean content for hours! It is amazing!

Yep, just happy to be fishing.....

MystikMan, I love you!

Today nine years ago, I walked down the aisle towards a man who was crying, holding his tissues in his hands with dimples on either side of his face. I was a bit stunned at his obvious display of emotion, but he was also smiling, hence the dimples. He grabbed my hands and wanted to kiss me and I had to tell him, "Not yet!".

I didn't have tears that evening, truth be told, I cried that morning at my grandfather's grave alongside my mom and sister. Maybe it was the thought of my Grandpa not being able to share in this moment with me, or maybe the nerves of the morning and pending nuptials, but the tears flowed. Grandpa would have loved the wedding and he would have had so much fun. Yeah, it would have been nice to have him there. But my tears were done and all I had inside of my heart was confidence. I knew I was marrying a man worthy of myself in all aspects.

We stood before all our relatives and friends pledging our love, confessing our promises and sharing in ceremony, one created by us. It was a wonderful night. We danced throughout the evening, ate a royal meal and just laughed with each other. I was blissfully happy, smiling ear to ear the entire evening. I was a bride on cloud nine, secure, loved, matched.

Our love has been tested over the 9 years, but today, I say with every fiber in my being, I made the best decision ever when I said "YES"! Mystikman has proved his love for me many times over and still amazes me from time to time. He is sexier than ever, at least to me, and I love him beyond words.

Last night, I just wanted to curl up inside his embrace and breath him in, not letting go. I am lucky, blessed, tickled pink that we found each other!

Happy Anniversary lovely!

May Connections

This week I have enjoyed great conversation with 2 extremely wonderful friends! It was great! You know that was all I needed to feel full again. I rarely identify the need for others in my life. I have been one of those self sufficient types. However, this past month, I have felt as if there was something lacking and when I identified the source, I realized that I needed to be in touch with my friends. There is a special connection you make with a total stranger who becomes a friend.

I was able to connect with 2 amazing women in my life and listen to their struggles and triumphs. One friend lost her job, but she found her strength in the process. What a personal achievement! In light of her situation she was able to find the silver lining, talk it through, figure out an action plan and take the necessary steps to discover her new path. Deep down I know this change in her life will be a major turning point for her, but she will make it!

Another friend also had a turning point, she released a toxic relationship on her terms and took control of her life. Again, she found her strength and courage to own up to the toxins and make healthy choices. She is such a creative spirit and finally was able to find her muse.

I am blessed that both of these women found time to share their experience with me and allow me to be part of their realization process. Good friends, those who know you, love you, accept you, challenge you and support you are the best!

May Movies

This month mystikman and I took in two movies, Slumdog Millionaire and Vicky/Cristina Barcelona. Both movies reminded me of earlier times in my life. Each brought with it some escape, but clearly, there was a winner in my opinion on which one was better for me!

Slumdog Millionaire, reminded me of a past love. This brought forward all those dreams he and I had once. Mostly the cultural aspect, as he is Indian. I could see why the movie won best picture, but honestly, I didn't care for it at all. I hated seeing the children make it on their own, living in such poverty. I internalized, which I know I shouldn't have done, and thought about my boys being forced into somethng so terrible. All in all, it just made me feel yucky and unsettled. Of course the added layer of personal experience and memories didn't help!

Vicky/Cristina Barcelona was another film that brought back many memories, but this film was more comfortable for me. The scenery put me at ease instantly and the music was light, moving and pleasing. I found myself relating to both of the girls at one point or another and I laughed at how silly it all is, but ever so important at the moment. Love is difficult topic to tackle. But this movie hit many levels of its layers and I found it refreshing!

Muscle Memory.. May Musings

She passed me! I took a level 6 swim test via the Red Cross today. I had to swim 500 yards, multiple strokes continually. There were some dives, safety procedures, rescue strokes and turns. I completed them all and achieved the highest level of swim instruction for the 2nd time in my life, HA!

Guess those muscles of mine remember what to do after 10 years of not swimming on a regular basis. Muscle memory must also be the reason, I am not sore at all! After butterfly, one would think my shoulders would be hurting... nope. Must be doing it wrong? Nope, I passed after all.

Swimming is amazing and I am happy that I still have it.

May Makings

Making 1 - Organization
Okay so do you remember how I have this crazy desire to organize my filing cabinet and put all of those warranty/instruction manuals in order? Well today I did it! Finally after 7 years of wanting to do this, I did it! Talk about an overdue project!

I have one drawer left, but truth be told, it is mystikman's not mine. But I will organize it for him.

In the process I was able to open up one slot on my desk organizer, which was needed. All said and done, there were 3 bags of paper thrown out! Can you imagine, each time I moved, I was lugging around all that extra paper? Before the move here, I had 2 tubs full of paper to unload! Amazing all that stuff we haul around all the time.

Making 2 - Food


Tonight for dinner, I just happen to whip us some herbed spatzle. I found a technique and recipe that works terrific and the result is bounissimo! The boys love it and were walking around the house saying things like "You rock mommy" and "You are the best spatzle maker in the world"! To find a meal the boys love and will eat up at dinner is a great accomplishment.

Mixing the Batter simple simple recipe, 1/2c milk, 3 eggs, 1 1/2c flour S&P to taste, sprinkle in dill, lavender, beau monde, herbs d'Provence, or whatever herbs you like.


Put mixture in a spatzle maker, which I love, or pour through something with holds, like a colander/strainer.

There was a huge pile of Spatzle on his plate... notice they were eaten before the bratwurst and the boys LOVE bratwurst!


Hats off to my birthplace for inspiring my love of German Foods!

May Musing on Loneliness

Feeling a bit lonely these days. Actually the past couple of weeks, I realized that I was missing my friends. I miss talking to people that know me and we have a memory together. It seems we are all so very busy, family, work, social obligations, hobbies, routines etc. Of course this isn't helped by the simple fact, all of my friends live miles away! I mean miles!

Where most friends are down the block or a short drive away, mine span the country and an ocean or two. When friends gather and make plans for dinner, the movie, shopping, hanging out, well I just don't do that. Actually I haven't done that for quite some time. Last time that really happened was back in 1999. Since that time, I married and moved with mystikman. We moved there and then there and now here.

The most constant contact I have is with my family and I spent a good 2 years in turmoil because of that contact. It was harsh, cruel and not nurturing. Things have improved and the contact is not painful anymore.

But this doesn't take away that from time to time I miss my friends. I miss growing in conversation, dialogue what have you. The boys provide ample interaction and mystikman is good company, but there is something to be said for good friends.

I have made some new friends and look forward to growing these relationships, but where does that leave the old ones? We seem to be spreading out and walking away from each other.

Let me provide a visual...imagine me in the center with a handful of people walking away making a firework explosion pattern. All of my friends hail from different times of my life in different locations of my life. I honestly can say 2 people became friends of mine at the same time. They couldn't be more different and they are not really friends. They were only brought together via me. But the rest I found along my path, college, Urbino, Masters Degree, London, VISTA, (sorry still don't want to refer to this as AmeriCorps), NOLA, NY and now Miami.
All these different stops along they way, I made some really great friends that wanted to go in the same direction. Now we all have split up and taken a different route. Maybe I want to meet up again at a familiar train stop? Maybe that is all I need to feel connected again? I don't' know, but I am admitting, which I rarely do, that I miss my friends. I miss the laughter, the fun, the hugs, the serious talks, the exchange of ideas. Yes I miss the exchange.

Having said this, I love MystikMan! He is my constant my touchstone. I appreciate him, even when he pesters me!

Mystik Man Arrives

"Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude.” – unknown


This is what mystikman emailed me yesterday. He has arrived!!!!!

Mystik Man and More May Musings

Okay so I am going to try this one out... instead of hubbie, which sounds a little strange coming from me, the anti nickname gal... I am going to move to mystikman. I was pondering how to keep all things Mystik and well, not certain how the easiest of adjectives escaped me... MAN, but it did.

Now if only I could find one for family... Mystik Family, Mystik Gang, Mystik..... well you see how I might be stumped on this one?

Update on the PC... VISTA is working great! Once I got the PC back to doing what I want it to do, all is fine. The printer is fantastic and finally it has found a home. Literally, it was in 4 different places before it found a home. I also cleared out one file drawer and have a nice bag full of paper in need of shredding. Mercury Retrograde strikes back.... the shredder is not working! UGH!

Has anyone actually taken the time to file all of those instruction, warranty information papers they get when they purchase something? I have another file drawer filled to capacity with stuff like that. Intentions were to catalog them, alpha order and 3 hole punch for the binder, you know "Home Maintenance" binder that every household should have... don't' have one?

Well off to organize something... or maybe color, I have really enjoyed this pattern of listening to L practice his piano while I sit and color beside him. Yeah coloring sounds better than organizing for the day. You could say it almost qualifies as one of those rainy days where you want to curl up on the couch and read a good book or take a nap....

More May Musings...

Well the musings this past week took me backwards. If you follow astrology, you are aware we are experiencing Mercury Retrograde. Mercury being the planet of communication, was moving backward and then goes forward again over the same path. Imagine taking a drive getting half way there, realizing you forgot something at home and having to go back, seeing the same scenery, then finally starting out once more, passing the things you already passed twice! During this period, we most likely will experience going over things that we thought were solid, several times. We may be forced to look at things in the past, as they come to the surface once more.

This is not bad, but it forces us to pay closer attention to detail and we should be patient with the process as there is reason for reanalysis.

This past week, I have been questioning some friendships. Not in terms of good or bad, but in terms of where do we go from here? It is basically, my thoughts alone on this, as the other parties are busy with their lives, but I am feeling a pulling away and I have to pay attention to my gut. We shall see where this leads.

My brakes blew out! In an effort to avoid an awful accident, I slammed on my breaks to blow the brake line wide open. Due to the Northern Rust, there were several weak spots. We were forced to take some time for repair, replacement and pause. Dealing with our Northern influence after all this time of being in the South.

I have been going through an intense swim training program in order to become a Teacher's Aide. This will provide me with some exercise and it allows my boys to receive free swim lessons all summer long! What a benefit! While focusing on my swim strokes, I am transported back to a time when I did swim frequently and quite frankly, I am good at this, really good! It has been nice to get in the water and go through all the strokes. Also it feels good to be demonstrating certain techniques for the rest of the class, as I am that good. Okay, I am not modest here, but really, I know my stuff in the water! I am reminded of my childhood days when I wanted to be a swim instructor, after all these years, I am real close!

Ever have a feeling and not know what it is? Suffering for an hour or so, I finally realize the awful pain inside my body was not a heart attack, but Heart Burn! It has been years, since I have last suffered from this awful pain. I took many tests and many pills to finally arrive at a place of being pain free! But this past week, I was in full flare up and didn't realize the pain I was having. Finally, it hit me and I just couldn't understand why on earth after all these 10 plus years I was having this again. Still don't know why, my body is bloated with heart burn pain...but it certainly took me back to those days to figure out what I did wrong this time.

Simple Mercury Retrograde Lesson...Never buy electronics or do anything technical! I did both, upgraded my entire computer system to VISTA... which took more than one go around and I bought a printer.. well two actually, but returned the first one. The printer we ended up keeping is still not installed and isn't at home on my desk yet. I have tried it in 2 positions thus far and still need to try another one!!!

Then there is this cough... that halts all activity now and then.

So you see, May has proved quite a month for me and we are only mid way through! Maybe I will try to use calm now to piece back all the pieces that were undone to find a different destination lies ahead!